Tuesday, October 29, 2013

The Antidote to Co-Dependency

Gawd but I love her.  I've been doing a lot of reading and soul searching around my co-dependency issues.  I know, I know, the term gets bandied about like nobodies business.  But do you really understand what it defines?  Look it up.  It's the root of all addictive behaviors.  We all have it.  It's about healthy boundaries, self respect and self love.

I've been reading Melody Beattie's book "Codependent's Guide to the 12 Steps."  So many revelations in there.  But I am having terrible struggles with the whole God concept.  The 12 steps allow one to define God in whatever way makes sense to them.  But then they emphasize a personal God to whom you can had over your burdens.  See?  That makes no sense to me.  The closest I can get to a concept of God is the collective universe, all the sentient beings who have ever lived.  But I seriously doubt they have a personal interest in my well-being.  Nor should they.  They're doing their thing, they are done with this earthly journey.

I found this image on Facebook this morning and it dovetailed perfectly with the reading I did last night. It's humorous, and absolutely spot on.

1 comment:

  1. There is some synchronicity here. In my last post, I quoted Walt Whitman's words::

    "... argue not concerning God ..."


    "...re-examine all you have been told in school or church or in any book, and dismiss whatever insults your own soul ..."

    I've found these books to be helpful:

    Waiting: A Non-Believer's Higher Power, by Marya Hornbacher
    A Burning Desire: Dharma God and the Path of Recovery, by Kevin Griffin

    I sense that Yosemite Valley and the Pacific Ocean have a personal interest in my well-being because I feel loved in those places. For me, God is a place. Mother Earth. Father Sky. That is what restores me to sanity when I start to spin out in one way or another.

    An atheist friend of mine remained atheist to her dying day at age 86, but she did say that there was "something" that had restored her to sanity when she was 72 years old after years of suffering. She didn't call it God. She called it "something." She helped me walk through the 12 Steps. She didn't argue about God. I am grateful to her.

    Thank you for bringing up this topic today and for the photo of Katherine Hepburn. I was named after my father's mother, but I have suspected that my mother was secretly pleased to think that I was given the name of the character Katherine Hepburn played in Adam's Rib, which came out in 1949 -- the year I was born.

    I keep working on healthy boundaries, self-respect and self-love, too. And humor (-: