Friday, June 26, 2015

TGIF (On Marriage Equality)

Eleven years ago this appeared in the San Diego Union newspaper.  Ten years ago our friend's blog posted our San Francisco wedding story.

To think it all began in Hawaii in 1991.  Justice did not prevail then, but without brave Hawaiians filing suit, this issue may not have advanced.

As you know, our marriage didn't last, but I still love that the fight for marriage equality has carried on and we have prevailed with the US Supreme Court.  In a mere 24 years the issue of justice and equality for all, yes, even for queer folks, caught the peoples' imagination.  While the battle seemed long and made us weary, 24 years is actually lightening speed fast when it comes to such social change.

I have been married to both men and women.  When S. and I were married August 2014, I was amazed at how easy the process was.  No big deal.  No earth shattering consequences.  My parents attended our small ceremony.  They did not pay the same attention to my marriage with my wife.

So, in the end, justice has prevailed.  Love is love.  The legal institution granting 'validity' to relationships is available to all who desire it.

“Justice will not be served until those who are unaffected are as outraged as those who are.”  -- Ben Franklin

So, now, may be advance the rights of all marginalized people in this country?  Now is the time.
  • Voting rights for African Americans.  
  • The right of African American men to walk freely and unmolested by police.
  • The Equal Rights Amendment for women, which is back on the national stove-top.
  • Economic justice for the poor.
So much to do.  But I'm feeling it today, si, se puede!

Have a great weekend my friends, comrades in arms!


  1. I don't think I knew you yet. But I remember so well the excitement and glory of those SF weddings. I sent some flowers to be given to someone in line. xoxo

    1. Oh Kathy, your flowers meant everything to the couple who received them. Ours were from a het couple in Kansas of all places. To see the outpouring of love and support filled my heart to the brim.

  2. Now I understand why one of my college classmates and her girlfriend moved to Hawaii around 1991. I thought it was just because her girlfriend was Hawaiian. I didn't know that it all started in Hawaii. I've learned so much from you. So much has changed since 1991. Thank you for your part in that change.

  3. To love and marriage for all! A truly wonderful day.

  4. Nice post. In order to have economic justice for the poor we absolutely must get rid of the Citizen's United ruling.

    I was so pleased to see the White House lit up in rainbow colors.