I must be a crazy old lady to have signed up for an on-line dating site. Two of them: Silver Singles and Zoosk. It has been an enlightening experience, shall we say....
I don't know what got hold of my mind, as I've been quite content being single. As I began to come out of the doldrums of the pandemic lockdowns and my own, unrelated, near death experience, I saw the world anew, full of possibility. "Why not?" I asked. So I did.
There are plenty of con men on-line, and both my sites have already notified me that they pulled a member because of suspicious activity. Yikes. There are also warnings about not giving people money and/or bank account information. Who would do that?!
I have a brunch date tomorrow with a man I've talked to on the phone multiple times. We never run out of topics and we have many common interests. However, I am approaching this with extreme caution. Neutral location, no last names, yada yada. I'm also clear that whomever I meet I want to take it very slowly. I'm looking for a friend who might end up being a partner. I'm also clear I don't want to marry, and I really enjoy living alone, so they'd have to be okay with that.
Yesterday I canceled one of the sites because I just wasn't see any good candidates. I may do the same with the other. What I did do was contact a match making service. A friend of mine recently had very good luck with a service, and so I have taken the plunge. The advantages are 1,) screening and background checks 2.) a deep dive into each person in order to find a good match 3.) no need to scroll through websites every few days on a search.
This whole process may lead me to understand that I am, indeed, happy to be on my own. If that is the case, so be it. I read an article in the NYT this week that said, statistically, people who have lots of friends, or a few really good friends, have fewer risks of stroke, heart attack and other maladies. I've read similar studies before. Even more than romantic attachment, friendships are the stuff of a good and happy life. In that regard, I am wealthy beyond measure.