Women Who Were my Role Models

A lovely warm day just ahead of another snow storm.  Bitter cold with more on the way.  I did have a lovely evening with my kids and grandkids tonight, full of silliness and good feelings.

My daughter and son-in-law worked out logistics for my surgery on March 28.  Bariatric surgery to help me lose a lot of weight and (fingers crossed) keep it off.  The is somewhat old hat for me, as I had surgery 17 years ago to do this, but after 10 or so years, the LapBand they put in failed and had to be removed.  Trouble with my insurance company prevented me from getting a new surgery, and I ended up gaining a tremendous amount of weight.  After several years and negotiations with insurance Company, I now have 'permission' to move forward. If you are curious, there's a lot of info on line under Bariatric Bypass surgery.  I don't have the energy to explain it here, but it is the decision I have come to after much research and consultation with my doctors. 

Never too old to address obesity, I say.  I've struggled with it most of my adult life, and I remember when I had the lap band and dropped 109 pounds, I was ecstatic.  I was more healthy and mobile than ever in my adult life.  That's what I want to get back to.  Never too old.  Hope springs eternal.

March 28 is just around the corner. I am shopping for food items I will need in the first weeks after surgery.  And I timed the surgery so that I will be able to fly to California for my parents' service on May 2.  They will be buried on their beloved Monterey Peninsula.  A simple graveside service with family and a few friends who were close to us a children.

I saw my mother through her last days, and through her passing. I couldn't be there for my dad's final days, so it's more difficult to believe he is really gone.  It was so sudden, after all.  He had the stoke, went to the hospital, lingered for a few days and then died.  I also had nothing to do with the cleaning out of their apartment, so I can't imagine it empty of all the things they loved.  When I think of him, he is taking his morning walks, making meals in his kitchen, and enjoying sports on the television from his recliner.  He had a routine he liked very well, and think this routine helped him live longer. (Take note.)

With 5 deaths in 2 and a half years, I'm feeling my mortality keenly.  I'm planning ways that I can live out the rest of my life in ways that make me happy.  If I'm very lucky, I'll live to my early 80s.  That gives me 15 years to live it up to the best of my ability.  Become more mobile and healthy, get in a lot of family and friend time, and travel.  And enjoy my time and the creative arts it has to offer. 

We never know when our expiration date is (said my father) so we should live it up while we can.  Indeed. I am in agreement.  Do you think these sweet girls knew what their lives would be?  My grandmother and her two sisters, around 1920.  I knew them all, when middle and old age was upon them.  They were all pretty jolly until the weight of old age and ill health finally took them all. But even in their old age they were fun, smart, stylish, and doting on their grand children.

I recently had a large print of this made for my home. I want to look at them daily and remind myself how influential they were to me. Brave, educated woman who had children but still very much had their own lives.  So, cheers to you, Nadine, Ama Lou, and Kathleen!  They were also very supportive of my parents marriage, unlike my mother's parents.  

How I wish I could visit with them now.  How very odd that they are no longer with us.  They were a huge presence in my life.

Their fine example caries on with my daughter and her children.  My daughter did know grandmother, and remembers her well.